Instead of repeating the same mistakes your parents made, you can learn from them. Instead of wounding your kids, you can learn and grow from your experiences. This is what my mother did. She was a child – wait, it goes back a generation. Mom’s grandma was abused by her grandpa. This was back in 1910.
Grandma experienced such a horrible family life where she learned, deep down, that men are bad. Then my grandma found men that lived up to her expectations, she married men who were bad. This created a horrible upbringing for my mom.
My mom broke the chain of abuse. She rose above the destructive patterns that she was taught as a youth. I’m sure my mom knew that her home was missing something. She saw her friend’s family life and wished she had a life like they did.
Mom became a pioneer. She watched and read. She paid attention to how she was feeling, what her automatic responses were, and learned how to change. Mom realizes that grandma did the best she could with the information that she had, then selectively chose what patterns she was going to keep and pass on to her children.
She married a good man, and together the two of them raised my brother and me. Both of us felt like we were truly loved, like we belonged. As I grew, I learned that my mom had us in mind as she was facing all the pain and developing new thought patterns.
Mom became the parent that she always wished she had. It was a very difficult transition for her, but I know that my mom is glad she did. She has seen the love and cheering she did for us come back to her. She is completely loved and adored by her kids and grandkids.
February 2nd, 2010 at 9:36 pm
This is such a great reminder that we are all capable of breaking negative cycles that have been handed down through generations. Whether it’s something as horrifying as abuse or the more subtle but very damaging habits of negativity, poverty consciousness, bigotry, etc – we each have a choice to either perpetuate it or replace it with something better and more productive.
God bless you, your mom, and every other person who has the strength and courage to reject the damaging cycles of the past and to move ahead in light and love.
February 3rd, 2010 at 12:29 am
Thank you, Kathy~ It’s great that you can see it! And thank you for taking the time to share!
February 20th, 2010 at 1:27 am
I stumbled onto your blog and read a few post. I like your style of writing.
February 23rd, 2010 at 4:03 pm
Thank you Jacquetta~ I’m glad you like it! Check out this one: http://lindagraceonline.com/get-the-focus-on-you/ and get a picture next to your comments!
February 23rd, 2010 at 2:33 am
Hi there. I needed to let you know that some components of your website are onerous to read for me, as I am color blind. I am a sufferrer of protanopia, however there are other types of color blindness that may also experience problems. I can read most of the website Okay, and the elements I have issues with I am able to read by employing a adapted browser. However, it’d be nice if you would remember we color-blind types while undertaking the next web site revamp. Thanks.
February 23rd, 2010 at 4:05 pm
I dated a boy who was color blind when I was a teen, my daughter married a young man also, and I never thought of that! Would darkening the font color take care of that?
Hey, check out http://lindagraceonline.com/get-the-focus-on-you/ and gt a picture next to your comments! I would love to see who I was talking to